I've Seen The Light...

Have you ever had one of those days when strange things happen around you? Well, being one of your average friendly frogs, I come across lots of strange things when I'm out and about exploring the garden where I live. My friend Bob is what many, and even myself would call, a real character. I don't mean that he's out of his tree, or anything like that. It's just that he never ceases to surprise me with the things he gets up to from time to time. He has always been what in human terms is known as an inventor, though some may say, an eccentric. Actually, from way down at my level, I think he's quite clever at what he does. I mean to say that if every one of you humans is anywhere near as clever as he is, then I truly fail to understand why you lot are in such a sorry state at the moment?

As I was saying, Bob is a bit of an inventor. He's made this, well, I'd call it a perpetual portable sun machine with magnets and poles and things. To Bob, it's just a motor that never stops. Don't ask me for precise details, this is way over my head and, well, I'm just a simple frog! Anyway, during the winter time, he uses it inside his shed as a means to provide a miniature sun, along with his power tools. He says that it all works without it costing him a single penny. Now isn't that clever? You know what? This will mean that he'll no longer have to pay those greedy utility companies. Although it's something that helps him to see during the darker hours of winter, he says that he wants to see if he can build a much bigger one and fix a much bigger dynamo to it, something that he hopes will also provide him with light and heating around his house. He's still working on this side of it. Let's face it, anyone who can capture the sun and use it inside a shed has my greatest admiration, I can tell you.

Now, knowing Bob like I do, he probably won't like me telling you about another of his inventions, perhaps the oddest of them all, but only because it looks like it's a bit dangerous, specially after the first time he switched it on. Now if I understand you humans correctly, this has got to be one of those things that is surely got to be worth a lot of money. Bob has never been a wealthy man, in fact, he's always considered himself to be quite poor. You pensioners will know what I mean. Well, he said something about not being able to afford the patent for it, which, he tells me costs something like thirty-thousand pounds. Wow!! Now that sounds like a lot... doesn't it? What the heck is a patent? Why is it that you humans always have to make your lives so difficult all the time? He says that he's scared that someone could steal this idea from him, then go out and make tons of money from it. I told him that if he is so concerned about this, then he should use the drawings he made of it as toilet paper or something. He says that he'll think about it.

The trouble with me, even as a frog, I've got a bit of a blabber mouth. Yes I have, and you lot know it. I'm not sure that I should even be telling you lot this much, but if I had just an hour's use from it, I would teach all those mangy furballs around this garden, who the damn boss is. Believe me, they wouldn't even see me coming. Ribbit!!

Bob told me that it's his thingamajig, and it has the ability to bend light. Now, I know that I'm just a common or garden frog, certainly a garden frog anyway, but no matter how much I tax this tiny brain of mine, I really can't understand how anyone can hold light in their hands and then, bend it? I could be wrong, but perhaps Bob is finally losing his marbles after all? Surprisingly, as it happens, I was standing close by the first time Bob turned his little machine thingy on. His face turned a really funny colour, then it nearly knocked him feet over apex and into the side of the shed, but luckily, it did little more than stun him and make him violently sick. Shame really, he vanished for a few seconds, so we both know that it works. I feel sure that it could provide him with some money, but upon reflection though, perhaps this invention isn't such a good idea after all? I wouldn't like anything horrible and nasty to happen to Bob, specially if it was to harm him... I'd lose my bestest friend. Croak!!

Bob reckons that there's no money in inventing things these days. He says that everyone wants something for nothing, so what's the use of trying to make the world a better place? The more I learn about you humans and the way you treat each other, I would have to agree with what Bob is saying on this subject.

Stay safe, mind how you go, and do drop by and see me again soon...

Froggy