A Home Truth

Hi everyone,

My word, doesn't time fly... Now isn't that an odd thing to say? As I sit here beside my pond contemplating the world around me, I fail to understand the real meaning behind this saying that is apparently used by humans everywhere? I mean, I've seen flies fly, ladybirds fly, cranes fly, why I even saw butter fly once! But I have never seen time fly. What does it look like? Once I know, I'll do everything I can to keep my peepers open for it.

It's been another busy week, one where us frogs are starting to store up our body fats, you know the sort of thing I mean, it's to tide us over those freezing winter months ahead. Anyway, once again I've been talking to the man who looks after the garden I live in. And you know what? It's amazing just what a frog can discover by listening to others. Makes a pleasant change from listening to all that croaking at night, I can tell you. As I was saying, this man, who is a mine of information, told me that most of the males in your species go absolutely mad for something you call, football(?).

He says that it's a tribal thing, something that supposedly makes the women of your species more attractive to the males. He's surely gotta be kidding? That's not what I've heard, and I damn well told him so. Do they all really think that all these intelligent women want to go and watch a load of full grown men, kick a bladder around for hours on end? Don't you fool yourself! Take my word for it, they hate football! Listen to me, I've heard that it's the only way they can get together with their friends, (wink), and have a rip roaring time of their own. Football, Hahahahaha.....

Oo man, my sides are aching!
Birds! No, not that. I'm talking about the feathered kind. Well, they are starting to muscle in on my territory again, and it's all because the season is changing. I can tolerate their singing at four in the morning during the summer months, but what I can't stand, it's the noise from all their petty squabbling at this time of the year. And why do they do it, you may ask? It's because the man's garden is full of ripening fruit... and they are all fighting each other over who get's the best of it. It happens each and every year. Nothing changes! Where are those bloody cats when you really need them?

I'm all for a quiet life, so, that's all for now, I'll be seeing you...

Froggy